What's my dream?

I don't really know what, where, and how to start describing things that I've been hiding and imagining alone for years. So, please bear with my writing in case I go out of control. Alright, let's start, shall we?

I think I remember my childhood well enough to know which year that I finally realized what is my goal for life. I used to gang up with guys in my neighborhood and did many role plays as if those activities were real. I used to think that maybe I was meant to be a hairdresser, a stylist, or many more jobs that related to what I did with those guys. I had no particular goal. I had no plan. I had no dream.

Until one day, when I was around 7 years old, my family members were having a dinner together. As we were eating, mom saw a black woman in her suit and delivered speech for the United Nations. Then, she said, okay Pich, you should grow up and become like her. I did not even know that woman, but strangely, I felt that from now on, I have a mission for my whole life now.

"Ambassador, you have to become one", my mom said. Yes, that was her ambition. But now, it's mine.

When I was in grade 5, I was assigned to write a paragraph about my dream, and I wrote about my ambassador-wanted dream. I got 10 points. That was the first time ever. I knew what I really want to be.

However, since then on, I did not really tell anyone nor pay much attention to it, because it was too abstract. I believed it was more like an ideal job, than a real one. But it does not mean that it's out from my mind.

Until I was in grade 12 and chose a major for my university, then I chose a bachelor degree in art at IFL, and accidentally saw another major, which is DIS (Department of International Studies). I did not know what it was, but it was so interesting that I decided I should give it a try.

I never thought that I could pass the entrance exam. Being one of DIS-ers is my pride, and it is even greater to know that I'm actually chasing my dream for real now. As time goes by, I have understood enough how much I love my major, and dream. I am feeling that I am walking on a right track right now.

However, nothing is going perfectly in this world. Things get tough at times. As we have grown up more and more, we also have realized how dirty this world can be. And, a stack of cash can also give us headache about what to choose; our dream or our comfort in the future.

Honestly, I am in a dilemma right now. Probably, being an ambassador is what I have ever wanted in my life. But obstacles are there for me. I need to understand how far I can go, and whether it will eventually become true for me or not. Because on the other hand, I can just drop DIS and start a business with easier life.

So, what's my dream? You know already. But maybe I should ask another question, what do I really want in my life?